Why “Pushing Through” Keeps You Stuck
I used to think healing required intensity.
In chiropractic school, I got a bit of a reputation for being… heavy-handed.
I’m not a large person, but when I practiced on classmates, I pushed hard. I pressed deep. I wanted results. I remember someone wincing on the table—“too much”—and I didn’t have the sensitivity then to understand what that moment was trying to teach me.
At the time, my mindset was simple:
If something hurts, it must be stuck.
If it’s stuck, it needs to move.
If it needs to move, I just need to push hard enough.
And if I’m honest, that belief didn’t come from nowhere.
I was in pain too—long before chiropractic school. As a kid, as a teen, and especially as a young adult. The long hours studying certainly played a role. Bodies aren’t designed to be crouched over screens and books for years on end.
But as the years unfolded—and as I learned more about my own body—I realized the pain wasn’t only coming from posture or muscles or joints.
It was more subtle than that.
A lot of what my body carried wasn’t just physical strain.
It was stored stress. stored protection. stored survival.
Not just “hurt” in the physical sense… but emotional weight too.
And here’s what changed everything for me:
Pain isn’t only something happening in the body. It’s something being experienced through the nervous system.
Yes, pain can begin at a site of injury.
And also—pain can be amplified, maintained, and repeated when the nervous system is on alert.
When your system doesn’t feel safe, it does what it’s designed to do:
It guards.
It tightens.
It holds.
That holding pattern can show up as:
chronic upper back and neck tension
headaches and jaw clenching
low back pain that flares “for no reason”
a sense of always bracing, even when you’re resting
This is why “more pressure” isn’t always the answer.
Sometimes the body doesn’t need to be forced into change.
Sometimes it needs to be invited.
Because less can be more when the nervous system finally feels safe enough to let go.
Why this matters so much for moms
Most of the moms I see aren’t just dealing with “tight shoulders.”
They’re carrying:
the mental load
the responsibility load
the emotional load of being needed all day long
the quiet pressure of “Am I doing enough? Am I doing it right?”
And your nervous system hears all of it.
Even if you’re not consciously thinking “I’m not safe,” the body can still behave like it’s under threat.
Not necessarily threat of physical harm—but threat of overwhelm, disconnection, pressure, constantly being “on.”
And the body responds the way bodies respond:
By bracing.
So yes—someone can get an adjustment or deep tissue work and feel better for a day or a week.
But if your system is still living in protection, the tension often creeps back in—not because you failed, and not because your body is broken…
…but because your body is doing its job.
The shift: from force to safety
The journey from “push harder” to “go deeper” changed everything about how I care for people.
When someone comes in with pain, we absolutely address the physical pieces.
And we also listen for what the nervous system is saying underneath it.
We explore questions like:
Why is your system guarding right now?
What does “safe” not feel like in your life lately?
What would it be like for your body to trust again?
That might sound complex. And sometimes it is.
But often it’s surprisingly simple:
A body that feels seen begins to soften.
A system that feels safe begins to unwind.
A person who feels supported begins to heal.
This is what I see in my practice again and again:
Moms don’t just walk out in less pain.
They walk out feeling lighter.
Less burdened.
More clear.
More connected to themselves.
They begin to trust their bodies again—sometimes for the first time in years.
If this resonates…
If you’ve been trying to “push through,” and you’re tired of feeling like your body is fighting you…
You don’t need more force.
You need more safety.
And you don’t have to do it alone.
👉 If you’d like support, I offer a free 15-minute Clarity Call.
We’ll talk about what you’re experiencing and whether one of my care plans is the right fit for you.
Schedule your Clarity Call here.
